How to Sleep Without Longing

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Study a topic until you’ve negotiated which authorities you trust whole-heartedly, then allow yourself to intuit their shortcomings. Every owl has a blind spot, or else the fur of the forest would be spun only in excrement. If it is poetry you study, look to voices you trust bodily. It is subtle how the mind repeats its dilemmas out loud. Trust your hearing. Then honor your own blind life through praise, turning the soil, learning how to plant one plant at a time. It is not your job to establish forests, only to help them outlive you. Study the sky, knowing what it is. Study the sand, understanding its complexity and worth. It is not all about fertility. There are values that cannot be harvested. Please the mind, then yourself, and finally others–only if your pleasure is vast and sustainable. There is such a thing as a poisoned spring, of invasive species, even for the soul. Know yourself as one whose vision has been tuned by witness and is worth reciting. There are only so many days left. For you, and for the pattern itself. Don’t fear the end–or rather, don’t let your fear drive you out of the forest. Instead, accept inevitability as an owl accepts the coming day each night. Let your hunger drive you deep into the dark so that you hunt with your unnamed senses and sleep with peace.